I recently read this book where a woman has been having this long-time semi-relationship with this divorced man and about 3/4 of the way through the book she has a moment where she thinks, for the first time, "How long am I going to stay with this guy? Why am I doing this? How long will I indulge him?" That very night, she meets someone else.
Lately I've been having that moment with my job.
Being a PA on a small, (relatively) well-run independent feature was a lot of fun. This week, though, I'm working on a commercial for a major company with a major ad firm and a serious production company. Commercial work is supposed to be what aspiring PAs want to do in the sense that it is easier (for the most part) and it pays the bills (at least it pays better than a lot of other PA gigs.)
However, it's not as much fun. Well, I should preface by saying that I still am not the most experienced of PAs, and I still love my job and all, but, yeah, not as much fun.
A PA's time is the least valuable time in any production, but a lot of times on this particular production I feel like a leftover resource, an afterthought. Now, the power of a commercial is that it's well-funded and it can afford to let some resources idle while it focuses on more important things. Commercials are, in a way, a subsidy to the people that keep small, independent projects going.
But I never show up to a film set to get paid, I show up to work. When I'm not working, I get tired, listless and lazy. I'd like to think that I'm willing to do almost any task, but once I've been idling for awhile, I lose my edge, I stop anticipating problems.
Plus there's the fact that literally everyone outranks me and knows it (especially the guys who have been in this business as long as I've been alive). Most people are nice to PAs because they've been there and they understand our responsibilities. Some aren't because PAs are powerless and easy to fuck with. And because noone knows who to trust on the first day, I constantly have to prove I'm not a screw up until people get comfortable with me and start to understand who I am.
PAing commercials is supposed to be the peak of PAing life because it's more money for less work. However, I don't really need the money at the moment, and I like doing a bit more work. So if I'm here at what's supposed to be the top of the PAing business and finding it unsatisfying, what am I doing still being a PA?
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5 comments:
Hmmm... so you want to do more work for less pay?
Perhaps you should move-up the responsibility ladder dear cuz.
I think that's the logical next step.
What about more work over less time for more pay? Am I allowed to pick and choose like that?
It would just be nice at some point to have someone drive me instead of driving someone else. The problem with driving someone else is you have to wake up early to go pick them up, go to sleep late after you drop the car off, and either fight the suburban soldiers for Manhattan parking or double park and wait in the car or get your car towed, none of which are great options.
have you tried zip car? (suggestion for the smallest of your concerns in this post)
People do commercials so that they can afford to do the independent films. If you don't need the money from commercials, then screw it, and just go after films.
Out of curiosity, what do you want to do in films? Write? Direct? Are you a set junkie and happy to do anything?
That's a good question with a complex answer that keeps changing.
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